Working PI
by John M. Gaspar and Anthony Luizzo
In today’s digital world, where love is often a swipe or message away, scams disguised as romantic interludes have become one of the most emotionally and financially devastating crimes.
Introduction: Love, Deception, and Devastation
What starts as a friendly conversation can oftentimes spiral into a web of lies, manipulation, and, more often than not, financial ruin for the victim. Romance scams are not new, but the scale, sophistication, and emotional cost have increased exponentially.
According to the Federal Trade Commission, Americans reported losses exceeding $1.3 billion in 2023 alone. And yet, these figures barely scratch the surface, as many victims are too ashamed, devastated and embarrassingly humiliated to report what happened.
As private investigative sleuths, understanding the anatomy of these scams isn’t just vital, it’s essential. For the general citizenry however, knowing how to steer clear of fraudulent romantic interludes can mean the difference between emotional heartbreak and financial ruin.
A Global View of Scamming in the United States
The U.S. is ground zero for romance-related scam losses, with victims spanning all ages, professions, and economic backgrounds. The internet, while offering a connection, has also created a perfect hunting ground for scammers.
Most scams originate via:
• Dating apps (Tinder, Bumble, Match)
• Facebook and Instagram
• LinkedIn and Niche Forums
• Online games and chat groups
The majority of victims usually fall into two key demographics: older adults and recently widowed individuals. These are people looking for companionship and who often lack familiarity with the deceptive tactics employed online.
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Romance Fraud is a Global Phenomenon
Romance scams often originate outside the United States. Criminal syndicates use advanced Artificial Intelligence (AI) technology, cultural manipulation, and social engineering tactics to reach vulnerable targets in the U.S., Europe, and Asia.
Some global examples include:
• West Africa (Nigeria & Ghana): Home to the infamous “Yahoo Boys,” these organized scam networks target Westerners using playbooks filled with fake military personas, doctored photos, and heart-tugging tales.
• Eastern Europe (Ukraine & Romania): These regions are known for running highly structured scam farms, where dozens of “operators” communicate simultaneously with multiple victims using scripts and AI-generated imagery.
• Asia (Philippines, Malaysia, Japan): In Asia, romance scams are increasingly tied to cyber extortion. Victims may be tricked into sharing explicit content, which is then used for blackmail. AI and deepfakes are now creating a new wave of untraceable deception. This international element makes tracking and prosecution extremely difficult—another reason why PIs are critical assets in these cases.
Who is Vulnerable to Romance Scams?
Contrary to popular belief, victims are not foolish. Most are intelligent, educated, and emotionally stable individuals who are unfortunately caught in the spider’s deadly web of romantic trickery.
Common Risk Factors:
• Recent divorce or loss of a spouse
• Social isolation
• Victims are new to online dating or social platforms
• Victims are emotionally dependent or eager for companionship
• Financial independence (perceived as “good targets”)
Scammers tend to capitalize on emotional need. Empathy becomes a weapon against the victim.
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Romantic Scam-Related Red Flags Include:
• Scammers often avoid video chats or make excuses such as the camera is broken or there is a bad connection
• Scammers often claim to be working overseas, in the military, or in restricted zones
• Scammers often profess affection much too quickly
• Scammers often devise heartbreaking storylines and ask the victim for money for emergencies, tickets, or “temporary loans”
• Scammer “profile photos” are often purloined fake portraits
• Scammers isolate their victims to keep the interlude private
Checklist: How to Protect Yourself and Others
Whether advising a client or protecting your own family, use this vital checklist:
☐ Never send money to someone you haven’t met in person
☐ Always perform a reverse image search of profile photos
☐ Consider scheduling a video call to verify the romantic partner’s identity
☐ Always be on the lookout for assertion inconsistencies with a scammer
☐ Refrain from divulging personal information to scammers
☐ Consult with forensics experts when feeling puzzled
☐ Always report scams to the FBI IC3, FTC, or local law enforcement
☐ Always consult a trusted advisor
☐ Always trust your instincts
☐ Sometimes “too good to be true” is “not good at all”
The Role of Private Investigators in Romance Fraud
IP tracing and digital footprint analysis:
• Open-source intelligence (OSINT) gathers and analyzes publicly available information to identify threats and confirm whether a person is who they say they are
• Confirming or disproving identities and aliases
• PIs can conduct asset checks and financial paper-trails
• If the subject has a physical presence, surveillance and background checks
• PIs may offer assistance with civil or criminal complaints
Private Investigators, including my agency at ALL FLORIDA INVESTIGATIONS PRIVATE INVESTIGATIONS & FORENSIC SERVICE INC., combine forensics, law enforcement experience, and compassion to handle these delicate matters. Many of our clients arrive embarrassed, hurt, and confused. Our job is not just to expose fraud, but to help them heal. Watch our video “exposés and investigative breakdowns” at AFIPI.com/videos.
Education and Awareness Are All Part of The Solution
As PIs and community leaders, we have a responsibility to educate the public.
At AFI PI, we offer:
• Educational seminars for senior centers and churches
• Workshops for attorneys and financial advisors
• Consultations with families of potential victims
• Media interviews to raise national public awareness
Conclusion: When Love Is a Lie
Before turning a flicker into a flame, remember that romance scams are not just about money—they’re about trust, hope, and identity. For victims, recovery is difficult. For PIs, the mission is clear: protect, expose, educate, and support.
Staying one step ahead of romance thieves begins and ends with engaging your mind before your heart. Let’s be the voice of reason, the shield of justice, and the resource that victims trust and need.
About the Authors
John M. Gaspar, B.S, M.S, CFE BAI CSI is the Immediate Past President of the Florida Association of Private Investigators (FAPI), Former President of the Society of Professional Investigators, Past Chairperson of the Board Accredited Investigators (BAI), Retired NYP Major Case Squad Detective, and Retired FCSO Detective Supervisor of the Economic Crime Division
Anthony Luizzo has a long distinguished career in law enforcement with the NYPD, as a senior security executive with the NYC Mayor’s Office of Economic Development and the NYC Health & Hospitals Corporation, and is President of his PI firm.
One of the co-authors of this article has appeared on Montel Williams, 48 Hours, Sally Jesse Raphael, and podcasts nationwide. His firm investigates high-stakes fraud, death cases, and criminal matters across Florida and the U.S.
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Media & Videos: AFIPI.com/videos
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We’re always listening. Send your story submission/idea to the Editor: kendra@orep.org.
